Paying Attention II

Not Knowing
Fog had enveloped the entire mountain. At times we could only see 50-100 yards in front of us. The way was unclear, the path non-existent as we made our way cross-country up into the higher lakes basin.
This was the second day of the Johnson family Griswold backpacking vacation to the Cloud Peak Wilderness,
in the spectacular Bighorn Mountains of Wyoming. Day one had been taxing for Shane and Marissa, who were newcomers to lengthy backpacking trips, and the initial five miles of uphill trail hiking had certainly worn them out. Karina, a veteran of many of our adventure trips, and her new dog Yukon seemed to have fared better and had energy to spare.
Day two found us in the fog and drizzle as we left the trail and began bushwhacking our way to our destination at a high lake. With no trail to hike, Shane seemed to be enjoying the game of searching for rock cairns, little piles of rock spaced occasionally to mark an intended route. We were connecting the dots of rock cairns and laughing all the way. After a couple of hours of hiking the fog grew thicker and thicker and our final rock cairn led us to the edge of a boulder field that appeared to be endless. We each gingerly and tentatively worked our way slowly through the boulder-field, hopping from boulder to boulder. As the visibility diminished, and sense of bearings ebbed, my sense of anxiety and tension grew.
I am one who likes/needs to see and know. I like knowing what I’ll be doing tomorrow and next week.
I want to know where my career and life are headed. When I can’t see… I grow anxious, worried and fearful.
I need to be reminded that it’s ok to NOT KNOW. To instead trust and keep walking and enjoy the hike! Take a listen to these beautiful words from Sarah Young from the great devotional book Jesus Calling:
As you look at the day before you, you see a twisted, complicated path, with branches going off in all directions. You wonder how you can possibly find your way through that maze. Then you remember the One who is with you always, holding you by your right hand. You recall My promise to guide you with My counsel, and you begin to relax. As you look again at the path ahead, you notice that a peaceful fog has settled over it, obscuring your view. You can see only a few steps in front of you, so you turn your attention more fully to Me and begin to enjoy My Presence. The fog is a protection for you, calling you back into the present moment. Although I inhabit all of space and time, you can communicate with Me only here and now. Someday the fog will no longer be necessary, for you will have learned to keep your focus on Me and on the path just ahead of you.
I’ve never thought of fog as a protection, nor have I ever really felt peace when my vision is obscured by the fog. I usually instead, have a sense of anxiety or tension when the way is obscured or hidden. I like seeing where I’m going and knowing what’s ahead. Yet, I like this new twist, this new take on fog. When I am actively following Christ, I don’t have to see what’s around the next bend, I don’t have to know what I’ll be doing tomorrow, or next week, or in one year, or in my retirement. I’m simply called to walk, in trust, in conversation, in companionship and enjoy God’s presence along the journey. This is freeing, liberating and so full of grace! I don’t have to know! It’s ok to NOT KNOW!
If your pathway is uncertain, or life trail obscured by the fog, give thanks! Enjoy the protection and peace and lean into your relationship with God.


For we live by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7

The righteous will live by faith.” Galatians 3:11

For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Have I not commanded you?
Be strong & courageous.
Do not be terrified.
Do not be discouraged.
For I the Lord God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

Craving clarity, we attempt to eliminate the risk of trusting God. Fear of the unknown path stretching ahead of us destroys childlike trust in the Father’s active goodness and unrestricted love. Our trust does not always bring final clarity on this earth. It does not still the chaos or dull the pain or provide a crutch. When all else is unclear, the heart of trust says, as Jesus did on the cross, “into your hands I commit my spirit”. The way of trust is a movement into obscurity, into the undefined, into ambiguity, not into some predetermined, clearly delineated plan for the future. The next step discloses itself only out of a discernment of God acting in the desert of the present moment. The reality of naked trust is the life of a pilgrim who leaves what is nailed down, obvious and secure and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise. Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust