THE CHRISTIAN COMMUNICATOR

7- CRITERIA FOR GOOD COMMUNICATION
We do not speak to be seen, but to be understood, to convey a message without offending or disturbing anyone.
There is a big difference between communicating and communicating well.
To communicate is to be understood, but to communicate well is not only to be understood; it is also to be understood for the sole purpose of conveying a message without offending or disturbing anyone. However, a person can be hurt or offended depending on their vulnerability or feelings of guilt, even if the communication is good.
The goal of communicating well: Communicate well in order to live well with everyone.
It is important to be a linguist, to be eloquent, to have psychological capacity, all of this adds value and allows one to enjoy many privileges within society, because we live in a competitive world where education can open doors for us that, without it, risk remaining forever closed to us. But this does not mean communicating well, because with the self, consciously or unconsciously, one can be misunderstood, frowned upon, and unbearable, because in excellent communication one must use qualities of affability :
1.7.1 – Humility “We must neither hurt nor disturb others”:
 Regarding a meal you do not like, there is no need to say publicly, “I don’t eat this kind of food,” because what you dislike may very well be loved by someone else listening. In communication, tone sets the mood. Nothing should be neglected or forgotten, just as in Creole or Spanish, where every letter is pronounced.
 One should not point out to someone that their house is so far away, so poorly located in mud or dust, when planning to visit. Doing so risks making them devalue what they have worked so hard for over the years.
 One should not say to a person who confesses or apologizes, “Ah, you are like this,” but instead, one should congratulate and encourage this sincere conscience.
1.7.2 – Wisdom
You need to have patience, the ability to listen, and the ability to observe. Not only will this increase your knowledge, but it will also communicate that you are not selfish.
A wise man will hear and increase learning, And a man of understanding will attain wise counsel, NKJV Bible. Proverbs 1:5

1.7.3 – Discretion
We do not correct or reprimand in public. We are not here to destroy, but to build, rebuild, restore, encourage, honor, and uplift. This is why a good communicator cannot be a slanderer or a detractor No one should find themselves in an embarrassing situation with no way out because of a speech. ILLUSTRATION…
1.7.4 – Polished Language
One must always avoid coarse or vulgar speech, as it degrades one’s character. The way we speak reflects and communicates who we are.
1.7.5 – Dress and Appearance
One must always avoid indecent attire, as it can scandalize oneself. The way we dress reflects and communicates who we are.
It is not enough to simply wear decent clothing; one must also know how to match colors and choose appropriate clothing for every occasion. ILLUSTRATION…

FRAGILITY OF COMMUNICATION
We must never forget that our behavior can betray us. When we remain silent, when we are negligent or passive, when we fail to pay attention, or when we go to extremes… all of these behaviors can betray us.
Certain terms illustrate the fragility of communication.
1.8.1 – Silence
Silence is very different from passivity; they should not be confused. Silence is a response that communicates a position knowingly in a given situation. That is why it is said that silence does not exist in communication as emptiness or nothingness—it expresses something.
Passivity is a response that communicates a message of negligence or contempt regarding a situation. Therefore, it is important to reflect before choosing between silence and passivity because both communicate a message about oneself, for good or for ill. ILLUSTRATION…

Sometimes, silence can protect us from the harmful consequences of anger when it expresses the humility to live in peace despite everything.
Sometimes, we react in anger, thinking we are harming those who hurt us, but in reality, we only end up hurting ourselves.
– In life, it is often better to ignore certain situations, certain people, certain behaviors, or certain words.
– Also, sometimes, it is wiser not to react, in order to avoid consequences that can be harmful—even deadly.
– Never let hatred rule your life, for love is stronger than anything.
Therefore, let us have faith, fear of God, love, forgiveness, self-control, humility, kindness, honesty, tolerance, dignity; let us be steadfast, humble, wise, authentic, and above all, positive.
1.8.2 – Empathize with happiness or sorrow
When necessary, to avoid appearing jealous or insensitive. Apologizing after it is too late to empathize is a way of showing others that missing another opportunity is impossible. Passivity or silence could give the impression that we will always remain the same.
1.8.3 – Avoid speaking destructive words carelessly
Words such as hypocrite, traitor, disappointed (in someone), etc., can destroy sincere relationships. People often speak them to end a relationship.
One must be reserved, patient, and very supportive when wanting to maintain a relationship, when wanting to be a true communicator. We can judge in the moment to learn lessons, but we must not condemn quickly in order to preserve the possibility of saving a relationship. Otherwise, we will never experience the goodness of a relationship, never have lasting relationships, and we may appear—or be accused—of having a bad character.
1.8.4 – Give the Benefit of the Doubt
It is a sign of respect for others to avoid being too quick to condemn someone whose behavior could betray them.
1.8.5 – Be More Cautious Than Brave
This reflects the mindset of progress that communicates the desire to live in harmony with everyone. It is better to be cautious so as not to say anything foolish out of bravado.