Quiet Moments at the Boulders

People come into our lives or leave our lives for a reason, sometimes to care for, sometimes to be cared for. Sometimes we are the lesson, sometimes they teach us.

My grandparents sat in the exact same spot every week during Mass. The lady in front of them did too. She had these animals around her neck. The mouth of one was biting the tail of the other. The eyes were looking at me. I couldn't deal with it. Why was this lady wearing these animals? It was so hard to behave. I decided to not look that way, focus on the card. "The Lord be with you, And also with you." Don't look. Don't look. Communion will be soon. She'll get up and leave, while you stay here. You won't get in trouble. That worked fine until my cousin came to Mass with us one time.

I lacked grandmother because of early loss. He sent me another one next door. I lacked sisters, he sent soul sisters, I lacked friends and he sent them. Whatever I lacked, He sent. This pastor, this amazing, tiny woman, strong as a giant, no fear, he sent me to her.

I used to go to a certain inlet where, if you had a colander, you could pan for shark teeth like a miner pans for gold. The current brought them into the inlet. We never came home empty handed. The sharks don't have dental problems. They shed their teeth and grow new ones, unlike us. This is probably why they have such shiny, white teeth and smile a lot.

You don't realize you're in trouble until you notice how far off course you've gone. Finding your way back is going to take a while. Be kind to yourself on the journey back. You might be the only one who is.

What are you hanging on to? Is it your right to hold it against them? Is it the right to punish them? Which one do you want more, the ability to punish or peace in your own life? This is a one sided deal. It's for you.

Our son told Dr. Anders of my atrocious actions and held out his foot. He was prepared for the worst. I was standing there thinking, I'm a terrible mother. The Dr. looked at it for a minute and went into the cabinet to get tweezers. It peeled it right off. The toe hairs were singed, but the skin underneath was pink, not red, not burned. My husband and I stared at each other in disbelief. Dr. Anders put a dot of Silver medicine on the injury site, smiled and the nurse got a band aid. He was good to go! "Thank you Dr. Anders," we said sheepishly, getting up to leave. He smiled and said, "I'll see you guys real soon.”And he would see us real soon.

When it all comes crashing down and the convolutions of your reality no longer make sense, when the one you'd hold up the sun for is gone and the taking away is here, the tearing down begins and the bit is put to your mouth, you're going to need God.