Never Done Becoming One

One thing for sure is that every marriage is different, and each couple has their own unique dance. Therefore, there is a need for many different types of books on marriage. Most books on marriage use vignettes which share real life situations but changed names intended to protect the confidentiality of the holders of the story. This discussion on marriage won’t include vignettes of that nature, but my wife and I will share our story as the backdrop to the concepts we believe move us towards oneness. A witness tells all he or she has seen, heard and knows. This is an account of Jonathan and Katara’s journey towards oneness. It is our desire that our account will help others on their oneness trek. We dated for 3 months when I asked her to marry me. My wife and I married at young ages; she was 18 and I was 20. It went something like this. Katara and I were at a park overlooking San Francisco as I was admiring the beauty outside and inside my Chevy S-10 and I asked, “Katara how about we get married?” and Katara answered, “Let me think about it…O.K.” That’s when our journey took a turn towards oneness. God protects fools and babies; I was the fool and Katara was the baby. We both were naive about the things of life, but we knew that we wanted to experience it together. We met at a club in San Francisco. I was in the United States Marine Corps, and she was a senior in high school. I went to the club seeking, not a mate but a good time with no pressures to impress as evident in my choice of clothes (USMC sweats) for my “night out”. I really wasn’t thinking about meeting someone and embarking on the trip of a lifetime. I just wanted to go out with some friends, look at some beautiful California women, and drink till I couldn’t feel my face. But God had different plans. As I was “stumbling” around the club, I saw the most beautiful smile I’d ever seen. It was like I sobered up immediately— stopped stumbling and everything! So, I pushed past several men attempting to ask her to dance, took her hand and walked to the dance floor to “bedazzle” her with my awesome dancing skills. She must’ve liked what she saw because she never stopped smiling the whole time we were on the floor. I found out later she was laughing and was not at all impressed by my moves. Guess I was not as sober as I thought. That dance started our journey together. Journeys of two people normally start from two different paths and then at some point they converge. That convergence can be looked at as the beginning of the oneness process. The oneness process begins with the idea that a person needs to understand their family of origin. To become one with another person you must understand how you became the person you are.