Snow Leopards Leap

Chapter 2
Lion Instinct

Strategy 2: “Get Your Mind Right”

When going through a divorce or breakup, it may seem like you are about to lose your mind. But remember this: you can keep your mind and remain sane if you choose to. It’s a choice and you have total autonomy. Repeat after me: “I am not going to lose my mind. This is a temporary state that I will pass through and a feeling that I will recover from.”
Within six months after divorce decree number one was rendered, I had married my second husband, who I barely knew. My interpretation and misguidance of 1 Corinthians 7:9 was getting the best of me. Condemnation had me bound once again. I married a man this time who I barely knew because, “It is better to marry than to burn.” Where is the verse that said, “It is better to get to know thy spouse, before thou marrieth”? It is nowhere in the Bible.
This marriage caused a strong female to become weak, uncertain, and afraid. I experienced illnesses I had never experienced before in my life in this marriage. I lost a noticeable amount weight, lost self-confidence, and I’d lost myself. I was falling—fast. This marriage only lasted eleven months, but it was eleven months too long.
I am grateful for my praying parents who discerned something wasn’t right with me. I never told them what was going on in my marriage, but one day out of the blue (really by the unction of the Holy Spirit), my father drove eight hours from his home and rescued me. This day was the day that set my second divorce in motion. I had fallen, yet again. My spirit was crushed. My heart was hurting. My heart was broken. I was broken, and I did not have the strength or desire to repair the broken pieces again. I wouldn’t eat, bathe, or get out of bed. I hate you, marriage! You’re mean and insensitive. I tried you twice and look at what you’ve done to me. I was no longer the innocent and silly little girl exploring life. I had now become a fragmented young lady who had fallen and collapsed—yet again.
I was raised by a father who was a country boy and by a mother who was a city girl. They each had their own definition of “fighting back,” but they collectively agreed I needed to get up out of my bed of depression, dust myself off, and move on with life.

Arise [from spiritual depression to a new life], shine [be radiant with the glory and brilliance of the Lord]; for your light has come, And the glory and brilliance of the Lord has risen upon you.
—Isaiah 60:1 (AMP)

Despite the embarrassment and failure that I felt, yet again, moving on with my life was the best way to fight back. If I allowed this divorce to define me, then I would continue to live a life where I allowed situations to define me.
This was easier said than done. My mind was all over the place. I toggled with thoughts of happiness that I made it out alive, but I was flip-flopping with thoughts of Geesh girl, you can’t ever get it right. My mind was playing tricks on me. I had to find a way to get a grip on my thoughts. I felt like I was going insane.
My pastor preached a message where she described a lion. In the sermon, she referred to Proverbs 30:30 (NET) that states, “A lion, mightiest of the beasts, who does not retreat from anything.” She went on to state that a lion isn’t the fastest animal in the world, because the cheetah is. The lion isn’t the tallest animal in the world, because the giraffe is. The lion isn’t the strongest animal in the world, because the Antarctic blue whale is. What makes the lion the mightiest of the beasts? He is the mightiest because he thinks he is. At this exact moment, what are your thoughts about yourself? Do you think that you are a failure? Foolish? Unforgiven? Thoughts have power. As stated in Proverbs 23:7 (KJV), “As he thinketh in his heart, so is he.”
To move past a dissolved relationship, a marriage that ended in divorce, or any tough situation that caused you to think negative thoughts about life, about relationships, and even about yourself, you will have to get a grip on your thoughts. This strategy in the recovery process involves renewing your mind and changing your mindset. Your mindset has to be reset. Having a desire to get up is one thing, however, maintaining that desire is only possible when you get a grip on your thoughts.
Mindset reset is the process of changing your mindset or way of thinking in order to overcome obstacles and improve your overall well-being. Replacing negative thoughts with positive ones is an essential part of personal growth and happiness. It takes time and effort, but it’s worth it. You have the power to choose how you think and feel. That’s worth repeating: you have the power to choose how you think. Recovering from a dissolved relationship to leap forward in life is all about using the power that you have within you to choose your thoughts.