It Is Not Wrong to Ask Why
“The one question you should never ask God is why. It is not for you to know why.” After I became a follower of Jesus at 17 years old, I often heard phrases like this one. You may have heard similar teachings throughout your life. It might have been worded in different ways, but the idea was that we were simply to believe God and not question Him about why something was happening to us. It was as if to ask “Why” was to accuse God of doing something to us. Yet in almost every trial I have faced, the “Why” question just came out. It seemed a natural response to my circumstances. Yet, because of the teaching I had heard, every time I asked “Why”, I felt guilty. I felt like a sub-par Christian.
During the aftermath of the murder of my brother and his wife, I often called out to God, “Why me?” As I searched the Bible for answers, I realized this teaching of not asking God why was bad theology. I discovered this while reading through the psalms for comfort.
Repeatedly in the book of Psalms, the writer asks God why. At least fifteen times in nine verses, he asks, “Why?” Before continuing to read this book, I encourage you to read the following psalms: Psalm 10:1, Psalm 22:1, Psalm 42:9, Psalm 43:2, Psalm 44:23–24, Psalm 74:1, Psalm 74:11, and Psalm 88:14. In each of these passages, the author of the psalms is clearly hurting. He is going through some tremendous trial or tribulation. And amid his pain and suffering, he asks God, “Why?”
Pain and suffering often blind us to what God is doing. It is true of us. It was true of David. And it was true of the other psalmists. We sometimes cannot see God at work. Because we cannot see God at work, we wonder if God has rejected us. The psalmist often wondered if God had forgotten him or was hiding His face from him. In Psalm 44:23, he even asks, “Why are you sleeping, O Lord?” In his humanity, in the middle of his sufferings and trials, he naturally wanted to know why he was going through such hard times. He wanted to know, “Why me?”
Considering the concept of asking God why, there are a couple of important observations we should make. First, nowhere in the Bible can I find a case of God condemning David or anyone else for asking why. In fact, God quite obviously tells us to pray. There are many facets of prayer, but part of it is pouring out our soul before God. Read Psalm 88 as a great example of someone pouring out his soul before God. In prayer, we should pour out our anguish, our pain, our confusion, and our questions. God sees deep into our hearts already. He knows our anguish. He knows our pain. He knows our confusion. He knows our questions. He knows our hearts better than we know our own hearts.
Since God can see deep into our hearts, why not simply be honest with Him about the pain we are feeling? By doing so, we are humbly admitting to God our weakness and inability to understand our situation or to hold up under the pressure we are experiencing. Isn’t this exactly where God wants us? He wants us humble before Him, so do not hesitate to ask why. Let it out. Be honest. Be humble.
Another observation worth looking at is that in nearly every passage where David or another psalmist asks why, he also declares his faith in God in the same psalm. He does not doubt God’s power and ability to deliver. He asks why but knows that God can deliver him. In his anguish and pain, he finds God still worthy of praise and worship. It is as if the pain of trials and sufferings pointed the psalmists to God, which is a very important topic we will delve deeply into later in this book.
One last thought about asking God why. It is a rhetorical question on our part. It is not likely that we will hear some booming voice give us an answer to our question. We may not even hear a still small voice whispering the answer to us. We should not let this lack of specificity turn us from our faith in God. While He may not give us the answers we seek, He will most definitely comfort us in our suffering. He has and always will walk with us through our difficult situations.
We may never know an exact answer to why, but that does not mean there are no answers. The Bible answers this important question for us. In the rest of this book, I will share with you the answers God gave me when I was deep in the pain and confusion of my darkest times.