Think Outside The Box Concerning Marriage

Adam and Eve were naked and unashamed. It wasn’t because they didn’t have clothes and he was the man and she was the woman. It’s because they were relating spirit-to-spirit! They were in fellowship with God and each other. It was beautiful, or, as my daughter called it when she was five, “boo-fitul”. My daughter was and is precious. We were created by God as spiritual beings. Watchman Nee in his classic book, “The Spiritual Man”, says that man is a three-part being. We are a spirit being that possesses a soul and lives in a body. The spirit has three parts: worship, which connects us to God; conscience, which functions to tell us right from wrong, and intuition, which allows us to determine the manner of spirit in another person. Our souls encompass the mind, will and emotions. Our body contains all of this. I will go as far as to say, “We are God’s house.” I want to point out some things here. God made a helper FIT for Adam (emphasis mine). Many of us have not quite understood what that meant. Many men pick a woman for themselves based on what they THINK is fit for them. “Oh, she makes me feel good about myself all the time,” “She’s so good looking,” or, “I love her for her money,” and so on. By this reasoning we fall short of God’s desire for us and we have only a partially glorious marriage relationship, if that. Moreover, people grow and change over time. A partner gets sick at 35 and goes on Social Security Disability. A husband loses his well-paying job at 47 and has to tap into his savings. An economic downturn happens on their home loan, they lose their home and they file for bankruptcy. Turmoil occurs naturally and it is made worse when the husband and his woman are not joined together by God. I learned in my former marriage that negative circumstances reveal the deeper issues that are inside of us. Some of our circumstances are caused by us not taking care of our bodies and for not being responsible at work. When we are married and we have a partner completely of our own choosing, we don’t just grapple with the issues at hand and on the surface. God digs deep down also into the character issues that got us there in the first place. Revealing those character issues takes time sometimes. Our problems we cause can be deep rooted and long lasting. We pawn off out responsibilities and accountability to our partner and even the devil. We don’t stand up and take responsibility for our actions. We do a little “CYA” like Adam and Eve did. “CYA” stands for “Cover Your Anatomy”. I said it all right, didn’t I? Adam and Eve sewed fig leaves together themselves because a Singer sewing machine was sold out at Walmart back then. Those fig leaves they sewed together were made to cover their backsides, too. Think about fig leaves. They’re lush, big and green. They get brittle, turn brown and crack. Leaves drop to the ground. Adam and Eve could have run into a hanging tree branch while walking in the Garden and the fig leaf apron could have torn. They would have exposed their aprons again. Many of us apply our own solutions to our problems only to revisit the same problems again without solving them. God sought out Adam before and after Adam and Eve took the forbidden fruit because God wanted fellowship. Fellowship is communion. Communion is common union with God. Here is my interpretation of fellowship from 1 John 1:7, “But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship (communion, common union) with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ cleanses us from all (every) sin. (Everything in parentheses is my emphasis.)” Sin doesn’t just mean our offenses against God. I researched deeply and found out that sin also means to miss the mark so as to not share in the prize. The prize is to walk in the Spirit and let the Spirit of God be our guide; and let our spirit control our soul and body. To let our soul and not our spirit direct our lives is to miss the mark and not share in the prize, which is knowing God in fellowship, communion and intimacy. Overall, God is giving correction to eliminate the independent spirit in Adam and Eve. God no longer wanted Eve to operate in the soulish realm. She did it once. That was enough. God wanted Adam to not reap of the fruit of the ground of his own strength. God wanted Adam to love and serve Eve. He wanted Eve’s attention and focus to be on Adam. The Lord wanted both of their attention to be on Him. This is proper operation of a marriage: to operate with your spirit controlling your souls and your bodies, and being submissive to God for love, direction and fellowship. This is what works at home. God spoke to the man and the woman in correction to prevent an independent spirit in each of them.