Life Isn't Fair But Life Is Good

PROLOGUE

Dear 20-year-old Tammy,

You may not know me, but I know you. At twenty years of age the future looks uncertain and kind of scary.

To you right now is 1996, but for me it is 2016. Things are vastly different from what you could imagine! I'm twenty years older, and if you saw me on the street you wouldn't even recognize me.

I know you're struggling right now. Remember after you graduated from high school, after being so successful in sports, you were on top of the world? You were ready for college and set to become a veterinarian. You were dreaming of the man you would marry, planning for an amazing marriage, birthing four kids, living your childhood dream of working as a veterinarian and saving the lives of animals. Everything was going to be easy.

You never dreamed you'd be in the position you are now. You are coming to realize college just isn’t for you. You are back living at home and working two jobs, praying you'll find your path again. I know you are thinking your life is a mess. You're depressed and wondering how life could get so hard!

What you don’t know is that the hardest is yet to come. You can’t begin to guess what hurdles you will overcome.

You’ll never predict you will meet the man you’re going to marry shortly after starting your second job.

You don’t know that when you marry him you will hope to be blessed with five years of marriage before he passes away because of life-threatening health issues.

You can’t imagine what your first year of marriage will be like. How you will encounter countless surgeries, dialysis runs, and endless trips to the ER.

You don't know your dream of giving birth to four kids will be such a struggle and an impossibility.

You’ll never believe you'll endure eight years of infertility, twelve IUIs (intrauterine inseminations), an IVF (in vitro fertilization) cycle, and two FET (frozen embryo transfer) cycles before you finally turn to adoption.

I’m not telling you this to devastate you. I don’t want you to give up because you don’t believe you can do it.

I'm here to tell you that you can and you will.

You won't know how strong your husband is until you see how his strength and faith are an inspiration to people all over the world.

You can’t guess that your daughter will be brought into this world in a miraculous way best described as a "God thing", and that her story will help others realize miracles really do happen.

You will be shocked how others will be inspired by your marriage and faith and how much your story will touch them.

You don't know that all this will be possible precisely because of your struggles now at age twenty. Your break from college, and your second job, where you meet your husband, will change your life plans completely.

You'll go through more in the next twenty years than most people go through in a lifetime.

Right now, you need to know, you'll be okay. Your faith in God will be stronger, magnified, ten fold by your journey.

Later, you’ll get it. You’ll feel and know you are the luckiest woman in the world as you hold your sleeping daughter in your arms.

You have a hard road ahead of you. But I promise you, you'll be okay. Just like I know my 60-year-old self would tell me the same thing if she were talking to me now.

I know you’ll always be okay, because God is right by your side. Always.

Your story is amazing, and I promise it's worth it.

Hang in there. You’re in for a wild ride.

Love,

40-year-old Tammy