Beyond the Seen
by
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"You have cancer."
One always remembers the exact moment that news arrives. The sounds. The surroundings. The weather. Who was present. The time of day. For me, it happened not once but twice. Two separate cancers. Unrelated. Eighteen years apart. And many calls and doctor visits during these last twenty-two years to tell me one or the other of the cancers had spread, or that I was in complete remission, or that nothing remained to be done to prevent impending death.
Facing one's mortality is daunting and actually determines the trajectory of one’s life. The meaning we make of death translates into the purposes we choose for our lives. Since the very beginning of time, we have looked at the skies and the twinkling stars and wondered what secrets they might hold. We have searched for ways to unravel the mysteries of our Earth and the universe that contains it. We have tried to conquer the world that is hidden from our eyes, both in the skies beyond our vision and in the depths of the oceans. We humans have always sought to know, to understand, and to make sense of the world and our place in it. We have always had a sense that there is more than the eye can see. We want to know what lies beyond our five senses—the truths kept from our reach. We constantly search and strive for a world beyond ours. Just look at the temple ruins of ancient civilizations. I suspect we always want to know what we can only partly know.
Realizing all too well our mortality, we persist in seeing ourselves as eternal, denying the truth for as long as is humanly possible. Deep in our hearts, we know the reality of death—some of us have even seen it closely. Still, we hope that our lives will go on forever.
I have come to realize that the one true fear of all humanity, over all these years of existence, is the uncertainty of life, in general, and our lives, in particular. We have been searching for the origin since the dawn of time and are still nowhere near an answer. The ambiguity of our survival, as well as our final abode, makes the unknown appealing to our curious palates, heightens our inquisitive senses, and fuels our prying emotions.
I was always one who wanted certainty. I thought, wrongly, that it would give me comfort. I strained my eyes and frustrated my brain in an attempt to look far into the future, to see what I was never meant to see in the first place. In doing this, I missed out on living fully in the here and now, with the beauty of the moment often escaping me. It took me considerable time to come to terms with the fact that the only certainty in life is its uncertainty and that what I might characterize as a bad thing might actually be a good thing, a blessing in disguise.
Come to think of it, not knowing what we are not supposed to know is a blessing in disguise. The unpredictability of life will always haunt us if we keep feeding it our fears and insecurities. As we mature, we learn to trust the unfolding of life on life’s terms with less fear. We can notice all we have survived, even if we know it will all eventually end in death.
What had plagued my body and my soul and what I thought was an affliction turned out to be a blessing for me. Cancer caused me to look at life in an entirely new light, seeing what I had been blinded to previously. I realized that the continuity of our beings is not limited to this world, and I found the One ingredient that was missing from the recipe of my life.
During my journey, I found that it was a who, not a what, that made me whole, and that "who" was a God who is more interested in my spiritual growth than my plans and desire for certainty.
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About the Book
Facing one’s mortality is daunting, yet brings into sharp focus questions of life, death, and after life. Are you wondering if there is anything beyond our physical world? Are you wondering if any good can come of suffering? If so, you will want to read this inspiring story of a woman’s journey from skepticism to faith while living and even beyond. Facing multiple cancer treatments for two separate cancers, including one that is so rare only a handful of people are diagnosed worldwide, the author recounts her journey into recognizing a spiritual world that sustains. Join the author as she brings to life the blessings bestowed on her from when she first opened her heart to the possibility of the existence of a spiritual world that lies beyond the seen. Miraculously, not once but several times, the author’s cancers went into remission, returned, went into remission, returned, went into remission and so on. It was during these unchartered waters of uncertainty (am I living or dying?) that God met her in her doubts, fears and skepticism. It was during these times of uncertainty that He lavished His love, always with the focus on her spiritual growth. As her physical world constricts due to treatment and its side effects, her spiritual world expands and is enriched, bringing her peace in the uncertainty that once unsettled her. Told in a conversational style, you will spend an afternoon glimpsing into the unseen spiritual world and experience the overflowing of God’s unmerited grace.
Faith is the substance of things unseen, but during times of suffering, faith in an unseen God can seem practically impossible. In Beyond the Seen, Dawn graciously opens the window of her life and allows us to peek inside. What we find is a remarkably honest account of one woman’s journey to believe in a God who, though unseen, can be experienced in unimaginable ways – a God who sticks closer than a brother, who sustains us in all circumstances, and is worthy of our trust. I implore you to read Beyond the Seen. Your heart will thank you!
-Laura Seifert, Founder, Yes. Ministries
In this deeply personal journey, Dawn invites us into her most intimate experience that she refers to as “living while dying.” Facing multiple cancer treatments and remissions and now a cancer so rare that there are only a handful of people diagnosed worldwide, she faces uncharted treatment and dim prospects for cure. Her honesty regarding the torment of the cancer treatments, her concern for her family, and her wrestling with her faith is a gift to those facing desperate health situations, family and friends who stand by with a sense of helplessness, and caregivers who want to offer true help. Challenged by a doctor to “live large,” Dawn has not allowed her disease to restrict or define her. In one account she describes an afterlife experience. It gave her a perspective to see herself from above…that is where hope is found. Through all the uncertainty, disappointments, and suffering she gives us a perspective that cannot be found in research or theological books. It’s a story of faith live while living and even beyond.
-Bill Heston, D. Min
Beyond the Seen is a beautifully written journey of God’s pursuit towards us and His promises to remain with us in the midst of life’s struggles. Dawn gives a personal, raw and honest account of her walk with metastatic cancer and courageously demonstrates the importance of being honest with our emotions, questions, and doubts. Her reflections about her cancer journey leave us remembering God’s abundant grace and faithfulness to be with us in all circumstances.
-Lija Shah, Director, Caring Ministry, First Presbyterian Church Houston
About the Author
Dawn Cunningham resides in Houston, Texas with her husband, Gary. Her life is full with her three adult children, their spouses, and her six grandchildren. Living with two metastatic Stage IV terminal cancers, she wrote Beyond the Seen while facing end of life decisions and praying for yet another miracle to extend her life.