How to Pick Your Bride and How to Keep Her for Life

The Lord gave me a strong, uncontrollable desire to find a wife, but I had not been taught three important lessons: understanding money, being equally yoked, and marrying for life. I married my first wife shortly after entering college. Like many people, I was not prepared. I felt I was wonderfully loving and kind to her. I tried not to treat her like I had observed other people treating each other when I was growing up.
Before reading these books, I was just like many other people. I believe my first wife loved me because I applied the scriptural references I had learned from these books. I still believe my first wife’s parents also loved me. Applying biblical how-to love principles helped hide the fact that I was a non-college graduate employed as a banker at minimum wage. My wife, coming from a very successful and well-off family, did not know poverty and was disappointed with my inability to provide the lifestyle she was used to with her parents. My lack of finances did not stop me from providing her everything else a wife needs from her husband.

Lesson 1: Go to school and don’t marry until you earn enough money to take care of your family.

Read the scripture on how God instructed newlyweds to build their farms before their houses:

Prepare thy work and make it fit for thy self in the field, and afterward build thine house. (Proverbs 24:27 King James Version of Bible)

Alert to my wife’s need for wealthier experiences, I complained to the Lord in prayer: “Why is this happening? I am going to a Baptist church and have been extremely loving to my wife.” My earthly father graduated high school and was able to take care of a family of four and others.
The Holy Spirit came and filled my mind with knowledge about marriage. This book is not me; I was strenuously compelled by the Holy Spirit to write, at times not even sleeping at night. I spent about two years of my life working at my minimum-wage job, loving my wife (applying the principles the Holy Spirit sent me), and writing the words the Lord gave me about how to marry for life.
Thanks to God, the book was finally finished. I knew there was a possibility that I could provide for my first wife’s financial needs. However, shortly after I finished the book, my first wife moved out of my presence. Again, I complained to the Lord: “I did everything you told me in the book!” I was willing to go with her to counseling, but shortly thereafter, she was gone without any contact. She was many states away from my home. I wanted to marry her for life! It was then that I realized the book was not yet complete.
Struggling and stressed with near minimum-wage income for six months, not knowing any better, I began searching for another wife. I decided I would look for a more mature woman. I applied all the principles I had learned from God—everything I believe the Father had told me—but I avoided the equally yoked lessons of the Bible. My first wife had only been two years older than me, and I felt the need to find a more mature woman. My second wife was sixteen years older than me. After applying the other principles of the book the Holy Spirit gave me, she decided to marry me.
Still recovering from a feeling of abandonment, my first wife returned. She wanted to reengage the marriage. God knew I was applying what He had taught me in the book, but I did not think my first wife would be a prodigal. By that time, I was going to have my first child with my second wife, and I chose to send my first wife away.
I included the prodigal knowledge in the book and lived the book with my second wife. Equally yoked lessons were lightly applied to my second wife, but I regretted not applying it more strongly as I explained in my book. It might have improved my married life a hundredfold. Being equally yoked is a very important lesson from the Bible.
I did not strongly apply the equally yoked principle, but I did apply other biblical skills from the book. This book will be helpful for young men who are not married but of marrying age or married men who are struggling in their marriages. Experienced husbands will find tips for how to reinforce their marriages the way Jesus does. It will also be good for churches with high divorce rates.
Marriage can be fun and fulfilling, but many singles don’t know that it takes a lot of work. Are you prepared? It takes a man who is willing to apply the God-given principles found in the Bible about marriage. Marriage to my second wife was not easy, but applying and living the principles in my book made it many times easier. My wife and I had wonderful moments and experiences together. Arguments were kept to a minimum, and they were certainly not like I experienced as a child.
Thankfully, the Lord gave me the knowledge to restart. It worked when I was at fault and needed to change. It even worked when my wife was at fault. Twice in my second marriage, we had arguments—and my wife threatened to divorce me. My wife forgot about divorce within a day after I applied what I learned from this book.