Heart Prayers
A Life Restored after Decades of Abuse
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The deepest part of who I am was at one point, afraid to trust in a God who I felt had allowed unthinkable things to happen to me. Filled with confusion and resentment, I built walls to protect myself from the world and insulate my heart from witnessing the profound love you had for others when I felt utterly forsaken.
Father, I am so grateful that you helped me to see that my experiences created injuries that not only left a scab over my heart, but they also created a blindness to your love and compassion, both of which are my eternal inheritance.
I walked alone in my pain out of my blindness and not the disregard I believed you felt for me. You have faithfully breathed new life into my being, lifting me from glory to glory. Every breath I have taken is a living testament to the sanctifying love that flows from the cross.
For great is your love, reaching to the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Psalms 57:10
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About the Book
During the time in my life, before you won my trust and stole my heart, I would frequently lose myself in pondering the mystery and confusion of you. It scared me to think of the magnitude of creation and how small and insignificant it made me feel.
I was oblivious to the righteous workings of your character and had no idea that I played a role in all you have done. I supposed grace and mercy were an extension of your love. Yet in my wounded state, I believed the goodness of God was only available to those whom you recognized as having worth and value, not simply in the eternal kingdom that awaited, but in the day-to-day grind of life. How did I fit into your plan? What was my value?
It was in the darkest season of my life that I found you waiting to heal and restore me to a life that would reconstruct the pain of my past by replacing it with the free gift of a Father’s sacrificial love. No longer am I made small by the magnitude of creation.
Creation was designed to be subject to your image-bearers. So I stand in victory over the enemy’s deceptive attempts to rob me of the sovereign power of my inheritance.
“The works of the LORD are great, Studied by all who have pleasure in them” (Psalm 111:2)
About the Author
Cindy spent the first thirty years of her life self-medicating as a response to a continuum of childhood and adult physical and emotional abuse, including and not limited to incest, rape, and betrayal trauma.
I watched her grow in her relationship with God and, through that, embrace the power of his healing. Cindy has taken many psychology classes and is an emotional health life learner, but she would tell you that she does not credit college with her healing. It is through the power of the Holy Spirit that her life was changed, through the process of Christian counseling and support, pressing into God’s Word and community for love and support.
Cindy’s passion and calling are to help through encouragement and, in truth, sharing her story with those who suffer from fear, anxiety, shame, and condemnation in the hope that they will, as she has, find healing through Jesus!