Simple Conversations

Introduction

I have been involved with conversations all of my life. These interactions have happened all over the world. I love people, so these talk fests have come pretty easily for me. They make life come alive. You get to talking with people and learn so much. In one sense, they make the world go around. I have seen conversations change people for the better. A good talk about faith can change your direction in life or the things you are living for. This is a good thing.

I’ve never had a problem talking to people. I would sit beside someone at the mall and start talking. I did not care if people thought I was weird; it was simply fun to talk with them. I would find out where they were from and what they did in life. But the conversations I had the most were in my head. Psychologists call this kind of conversation self-talk. You know those voices in your head that make you feel weird at times? Those voice that say nasty things to you? That’s what I’m talking about.

As a child, I was a dreamer, but I kept having experiences that made me feel like I did not measure up. I began to believe that I did not belong. One time when I was playing little league, I had one of these situations. I was good at hitting the ball and led the league in hitting that year, but because I did not make the all-star team, I did not think it was good enough. Maybe you have had an experience like this.

I never really dated in high school because I did not think anyone wanted to have a date with me. I did not feel like the girls were interested in a person who was lame like me. I could not get over this feeling until college, when I was finally brave enough to ask someone on a date. I was surprised we had a good time! Over time I began to believe I was a likable guy. This helped when I asked my wife to marry me, and now we have been married for twenty-three years.

You have conversations in your head as well. Maybe you think you are not good enough and do not have what it takes. Maybe you are different, and the voices in your head tell you that you are the “I” in team. That’s called pride, whereas my issue was insecurity. For me, it was a conversation with my parents that made me realize that I could do just about whatever I set my mind to. This does not mean that I can be in the NBA at five feet four, but it means that I really did have what it takes to make it in life. The truth is you do as well.

A lot of the conversations we have in our head are lies—but we tell ourselves these tales over and over again and begin to believe they are true. Maybe you have been having this kind of conversation yourself. All I can say is find the help you need to get to the bottom of it. Realize that God made you a certain way, and you can get it done. Whatever you have on your mind, go after it and believe that you can make it in life. It does not mean it will be easy, but it means it will be worth it.

A school counselor made me feel like I did not belong in college. Not everyone is going to college, and that is fine. However, making a young person who wants to go to college feel like he or she can’t is sad. When I did get to college, I was not sure I could make it, but I put in the work, studied hard, and did well. I did not finish at the top of my class, but when I walked across that stage, I wanted to take my diploma to my counselor and show her I could do it.

If you are having trouble believing you belong, remember this: God made you, and he did not waste his time on you. He believes that you belong, and that should be enough. Because you do belong in the race, he will help you have the conversations that matter and accomplish what he made you for. If you trust him and walk in the truth of the gospel, the Lord will lead you. You can believe this. Over and over again in scripture, the Lord led people to overcome obstacles to live fully in the truth that set them free.

This book is about simple conversations that help mold your life. I want you to see that simple interactions can shape the trajectory and certainly the momentum of your life. God is using the everyday conversations you and I have to shape us. Although God is the one behind the change in us, the intentionality we have in these conversations is vital to make them purposeful.

I have seen how conversations have shaped my life and helped me be a better dad and husband. Just about every morning, I journal this very thought. I have seen progress over the years. I believe that our lives are a spiritual mix of the conversations we have. You can’t live in a hole and hope to be who God made you to be. Paul said that we are God’s workmanship. This means that God did not waste time on us. He made us to be the very best we can and to live life to fullest. I believe the best of us is brought out in the conversations we have. I hope you will be encouraged by this book and compelled to engage in worthwhile conversations. These conversations ultimately bring out the best of you.