Chapter 6
Different
Set-apart, young women. Have the courage to be different.
—Leslie Ludy
I often didn’t feel comfortable sharing with others what I really felt about my eye condition—even with God. I’d read my Bible and open my journal and think I was finally ready to vent my feelings, but deep down, I felt I shouldn’t feel the way I was feeling for many reasons. My logical mind would tell me, There are bigger issues in life than what you’re going through.
One day, however, I had so much on my heart that I had to let it out in prayer: Lord, why do I have to be different? Why do I have to go through this? What’s the purpose of it? It was more of a self-pity prayer moment. Hands up if you’ve ever thrown a self-pity party. But I was finally being real with God. I chose to pull my façade down and let it all out. The beautiful thing was that He met me exactly where I was. God gave me the comfort I desperately needed.
Being your authentic self with God brings the healing you need and the courage to move ahead; you cannot get to your breakthroughs wearing a mask. I was sitting in silence with everything out in the open. I then heard His still, small voice: Kerry, I have called you to be different.
The words the Lord spoke to my heart that day is what I believe He wants to say to this generation and to the generations to come. He has called us to be different on this earth not just for the sake of it but for His kingdom and glory. Embracing being physically different is just the beginning to finding your purpose and to borrow the words of Eli from Max Lucado’s film If Only I Had a Green Nose, “Remember, I made you different on purpose.”
During this time, I began to realize there was more to discover than just the physical aspects of being different; there was a spiritual aspect to being different that God began leading me on. God in all His goodness began revealing to me more of His passionate love for me and how much He desired to have my whole heart while holding nothing back. As if I were an onion, God began peeling layers off me one by one.
The time came when I had to decide to fully commit my life to Christ, to take His Word seriously, to take up my cross and follow Him. I mean truly live for Him; to live a life completely set apart. Don’t get me wrong; I encountered Him in such a beautiful and supernatural way. I was saved and loved Jesus from a very young age. But deep down, I knew there were areas of my heart I was still holding onto; I still felt I had to fully surrender all of me to Him.
It didn’t take long for me to discover that living a surrendered life in Christ Jesus radically set me apart. The scriptures say that we live in this world but we’re not of it (John 15:19). Jesus chose us out of the world, so being different is indeed our calling; we are to be the salt and light of the earth (Matthew 5:16). We’re meant to be representations of heaven to all. That in itself makes us different.
Reflecting the kingdom of heaven on this earth not only makes us different but it also makes a difference in the world around us.
Contrary to popular belief; our mission on the earth is not to reflect the culture around us by acting or looking like it—for the sake of trying to be relevant. Our calling is too great, and our standards are much higher. Our lives are to be lived for a purpose greater than pleasing ourselves or others. We’re called to be set apart and consecrated vessels for the kingdom of light and to unashamedly walk the straight and narrow path (Matthew 7:13–14).
In some nations, Christians are being put to death and persecuted for their belief in Jesus. Sadly, I see far too many Christians in the Western world too ashamed to stand up and represent Christ. We need to be aware that if Jesus Himself was often hated on then we as His followers are not exempt from it. We need to get over the fact that not everyone will like us and accept us. We should quit trying to fit in, because in the end we’re not meant to. We read in James 4:4 (NLT) “Don’t you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God.”
Completely surrendering our lives to Jesus is the beginning of living unashamedly different in our mind, body, and spirit. There’s nothing more freeing than letting go and dying to ourselves and thus we become fully alive in Christ. We shouldn’t allow fear and shame to keep us from our destiny. Living set apart for God is about putting Him first and foremost in our lives and loving Him well. Jesus said that if we love Him, we would obey Him (John 14:15). So, loving Jesus comes down to simply obeying Him scripturally and doing what He calls us to do daily, this declares Him the Lord of our lives.