Grieving Grant

On November 23, 2016, I awoke and cancelled my outdoor fitness class I teach. It was the day before Thanksgiving and I didn’t think many people would be there. Although I did not teach class that morning, I knew I needed to work out. As I look back at my running app on that day, I ran in the afternoon. It was around 1:30 PM. I returned to the apartment gym and completed my workout. I headed back to my apartment to take my dog on a walk, then go find a Christmas tree. Although Thanksgiving was the next day, I wanted to go get a Christmas tree to make things more festive. Before I reached the bottom step, I received a text from a dear friend whose mother-in-law lives in the same neighborhood as Grant, his dad and brother. The text read, “Tif, something is going on at the Mirabelle house. Are you o.k.?” My heart began racing. I texted my friend back that I was on my way. I texted my son. “Grant, this is Mom. A friend just texted me and said something was going on at the house. Are you all right?” No response. I texted again, “Grant, answer me!” I jumped into my car and hurried there. As I was exiting my complex, my friend called. His statement confirmed what I feared in my heart. It was horrible whatever “it” was. My heart was racing as I pulled into the neighborhood. Surrounding the house were police cars and people. I ran up to the neighbor’s house across the street. He said to the police officer, “Here is the mother; she needs to know what’s going on.” At this point, no one standing around knew. The detective told me there was gunfire in the house – and that my son did not make it. When I heard that it was my son who was gone, I screamed. In my grief and shock, I screamed, “No! Not Grant!” I screamed and could not stand. I could barely breathe. In my grief, I began to pray: “If I rise on the wings of dawn, if I settle down in the far side of the sea – even there, your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.” (Psalm 139:9, 10) “Greater is he who is in me, than he who is in the world.” (1 John 4:4) “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13) This is one of the many blessings to memorize Scripture. Not only is it because we learn to know God’s truths and promises, but the Holy Spirit brings to mind these truths in our times of need. The Bible tells us the Word of God is sharper than any two edged sword, and I believe that. I believe the Lord has battled for me from the beginning of time. On that November afternoon, the Lion of the tribe of Judah had risen – and kept my spirit soaring and fighting, as my physical body lacked the strength to get off of the ground. Two friends stayed with me that Thanksgiving Eve. This was the beginning of my life journey after losing on Earth the life of my remarkable Grant. Since that afternoon, life has never been the same. I am so grateful for the friends God placed in my life. I’ll always remember the love they shared with me on that horrific November afternoon, as I went into shock after discovering the death of my firstborn son.