Spring till September

Caroline picks up the laundry basket as she hears the screen door to the back porch slam then bounce shut. She works her way through the kitchen and living room collecting forgotten items along the way that never seem to make it to the washer. She climbs the stairs and an icy breeze blows across her face from the open windows despite the April sun casting its golden glow.

With basket still resting comfortably on her hip, she walks into to her bedroom, strips the sheets from the bed, coming back to drop them over the railing grinning as they fall to the living room floor below. Moving on, Caroline stops in the loft picking up books off the floor placing them neatly back on the shelf. She tosses two throw pillows on the couch then sets the basket on her desk. She thinks about clearing off the bills, unfinished lesson plans, and a stack of tests that needs to be graded, but decides today is too beautiful to be cooped up inside.

She walks away ignoring the paperwork for another time to crank open the three windows at the far end of the loft that overlook the back yard and the pool. Dad called this morning saying he would be down after breakfast to help dip out the leaves and drain the water off the cover. She looks out the windows and doesn’t see him, so she knows she has a few more minutes, before she needs to go out and help.

Smiling again, her thoughts drift to pool day as a child. It was always one of her favorite days of the year and still is. Saturday morning and Dad would tell them it was time to take off the cover. She, Alex, and Nick would be wild with excitement even though swimming was still a few weeks away. They would rush around getting changed after breakfast and be running down the hill to see if Gran and Poppy were awake long before Dad would join them. It never failed, one of them would get wet or they would start fussing at each other as to who would do what, then Dad would roar out to them settled down. Privately, he was just as excited as they were, so his temper would not flare for long. One of the saddest days of Caroline’s year always took place several months later when the cover had to once again be put on the pool and it was closed for winter. Summer was over; definitely a day filled with melancholy.

Thinking back, she remembers…

When she was about eleven, Poppy bought a heater for the pool and they had warm water through the end of October. The week of Halloween was so warm that year Caroline had a pool party and invited her friends to go swimming. Unfortunately, it ended early with screams of fright and nine little girls couldn’t get out of the water fast enough, when a few bats decided to stop by for a drink of water. The screams quickly faded to laughter and wrapped in colorful towels they walked the path through a short stretch of woods back up the hill to Caroline’s house. Before they reached the clearing, four figures in horrible monster masks came out of the shadows and chased the girls the rest of the way to the safety of her parents.

Charging through the front door, the girls all started talking at once trying to explain to Caroline’s parents everything that had happened: the bats, getting out of the pool, climbing the hill, and then being chased. Before anything could be explained clearly Alex, Will, Carter, and Nick stomp onto the porch and start shouting for the girls to come out; beating on the windows, ringing the doorbell. Amid delighted squeals, the girls run out to see them and bask in the glow of the “beautiful older brother” leaving Caroline in the kitchen crying to her mother that the boys had ruined her party. Soon Caroline would be consoled and wet bathing suits are traded for t-shirts and shorts. The boys would be forgiven and allowed to stay for games, food, and laughter. Sometime just before midnight, Dad reminds the boys of their campout and they leave to their “fort” while the girls swoon. Even Caroline is a little disappointed they had to go.

She collects her basket then walks from of the loft, pausing briefly to dust the glass of a few picture frames and the length of a narrow hall table with the hem of her oversized t-shirt. Carefully placing each frame back in its appropriate place, she starts to move on to finish her morning house work, but one of the frames catches her eye. She returns to the table and instead of adjusting its angle, she picks it up to study the picture and is quickly lost in thought.

Without realizing, Caroline allows the basket to slip to the floor spilling at her feet and wanders back into her room to sit on the edge of the unmade bed. Moments earlier she was excited about Spring’s first warm day that is sunny enough to hang out sheets. She was glad to have a chance to spend most of the day outside and took a small joy in how she loves line-dried sheets. The sheets, the sunshine, and the overturned basket are forgotten and no longer important. She sits on the edge of the bed holding the frame staring almost without seeing.

The day is one of those perfect days that you looked forward to when the snow is falling in January and you think the cold will never end. The day asks for the blinds to be pulled all the way up. Windows are to be opened to let fresh breezes blow stirring up old dust removing any hint of the forgotten winter. The sun wants to create a warm happy dance driving away all shadows. But, the excitement of the finally arrived Spring is gone and Caroline has returned to the past.

She sits and she remembers.

How many times a day does she pass this very picture and it goes completely unnoticed? How often does she pick it up to dust, like she did moments before, and return it to its place with not so much as a second thought. She is unsure why today is any different or why there is a tightness gathering in her chest and smile on her face.

Memory…too often it will take you farther than you want to go and keep you longer than you want to stay. In a matter of heartbeats, Caroline’s memory is reeling down a road to an almost forgotten time. She traces the edges of the wooden frame with a finger and lets out a sigh. Thoughts of yesterday come back in an overwhelming flood. A silent tear quickly gives way to sobbing. Caroline slides from the bed to a sad heap on the floor, knees to chest, clutching the picture frame. Her mind and body are completely overcome and she does not even try to stop it. She lets the waves of sorrow pass over and over her. Pain and sadness, she has had locked deep inside are released in a torrent. The sobs are uncontrolled and has her gasping for breath as old wounds burst open bleeding out unending thoughts of why.

And she remembers…