Precious King’s Daughters

Chapter One
Lost and found; but who am I?
“I will seek that which was lost and bring back that which has strayed, and I will bandage the hurt and the crippled and will strengthen the weak and the sick, but I will destroy the fat and the strong [who have become hardhearted and perverse]; I will feed them with judgment and punishment.” Ezekiel 34:16 (Amplified Bible)
“For the Son of Man came to seek and to save that which was lost.” John 19:10 (Amplified Bible)
“I was running and He continued to run after me; He pursued me and He never stopped looking; when I stopped running, I heard Him my name; He said I am too valuable to remain lost; too precious for Him to let go of; He called me His daughter.” -Kemi Adefarakan
“There is no sea or pit too deep that God cannot pull you out of; there is no place too dark or far that He cannot see or rescue you from; there is no valley too low that He cannot find you; He is just waiting for you to cry out to Him”- Kemi Adefarakan
“I searched and looked in the wrong places for so long that I missed my way, I was blinded by lies that I could not see my way clearly, there was an emptiness in my life that no one or nothing could fill until I met You and You changed my story forever; thank You Lord for loving me; You found me when I was lost, opened my eyes when I was blind and filled the void in my life that no one or nothing could ever do.”- Kemi Adefarakan

The beach was packed full of people and as I walked along, I noticed a girl walking into the water. She would stop and then continue walking deeper into the water; I looked around to see if there was anyone around that looked like her parents, to see if they knew she was walking deeper and deeper into the water, but I did not see anyone that seemed to look like her parents. I kept asking myself, why isn’t anyone telling her to stop, why isn’t anyone telling her that it is too dangerous to keep on walking in.
Something about her fascinated me and I just stood and watched her as she went in deeper and deeper. All of a sudden, it looked like she was drowning in the sea, but no one saw her drowning, people were just walking and doing their own things, and I just wondered why no one could see her; she was screaming and screaming yet no one heard her, no one seemed to see her, no one seemed to acknowledge the fact that she was drowning. She would come up to try to catch her breath, and it then she would just go under again, she tried to swim, but she was getting tired from the waves of the sea, and the more she tried, the more tired she got and it seemed like she was just going to go under and not come back up again. I wondered why I was the only one that could see her or hear her screaming so I moved closer and I realized that she was not screaming out loud, she was trying to get someone to notice the fact that she was drowning, but she was not doing anything that would make people around her think she was drowning……

That girl was me; there was a time in my life that I was drowning and I was screaming on the inside for help, but no one could help because no one knew I was screaming. On the outside, I did not look like I was drowning, I looked like I had it all together, but deep down, I was drowning. I had made a lot of mistakes in my life and I did not know who I could talk to; I had made a lot of wrong choices which had changed my life and the devil really capitalized on that. He made it seem like there was no way out. I know that there are so many people that feel that same way or have felt that same way at one time or the other.
I am a Pastor’s kid and I grew up in the church, even though there was a point in my life that I did not really like going to my church then because there were to many rules; don’t wear this, don’t do this, I gave my life to Christ at a very early age and I loved being around my older sister who was born again. I looked up to her a lot and I used to like doing the things she did back then, so I think one of the reasons I did give my life to Christ was because of her. I did not really know who I was in Christ, and I was really confused about what I heard in church which I felt was different from what I read in the bible. There were so many rules; dos and don’ts and I felt like a hypocrite sometimes, because I would wear the things I was told in church I was not to wear and then going to church, I would take it off.
Back then, I felt like there was something missing in my life, I did not know what it was. I would make mistakes, repent and give my life to God again, and this cycle continued like that for a long time. It was when I went to University that I felt like I was drowning and I really felt lost; I wanted so much more for my life, but I did not know what it was, whenever I looked around me in the Church, everyone seemed so spiritual that I felt that I would be judged because people expected more out of me, so I just kept quiet.

I felt so lost even though there were people around me. Isn’t it amazing that you can feel lost and yet have people around you? I mastered the art of masking what I was going through even though deep inside me, I was screaming for help. I did not know who I was, I would look around me and I could not find a way out.

There are so many people who are drowning just like I was and who are feeling so lost and do not know who to talk to because the devil has lied to them that people will judge them, not like them or they will just walk away from them and they are feeling so lost and alone, and now they have masks on, and they have mastered the art of covering up what they are going through very well. I know what it feels like and I can tell you that until you finally give your life to God, begin to know Him for yourself, make His word your truth and receive His love, you will continue to feel very lost and alone.