Damaged
A First Responder’s Experiences Handling Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
by
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Drained, I sat in the passenger front seat of the ambulance and radioed the hospital to inform them of the girl’s demise. I was sitting in silence when we were dispatched to another nearby call. We asked to be taken out of service but instead were denied the request and told to take call. The rest of the shift was clouded. I remember it was extremely busy and I felt damaged
We entered the conference room at the main office. I threw my uniform shirt, tainted with the odor of burnt flesh, in the trash and lit a cigarette. My supervisor looked at me perplexed. I looked back at him and said one word, “ashtray”. I was indignant. I knew I wasn’t allowed to smoke in the building. I didn’t care. At this point nothing mattered.
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About the Book
One man's journey as a first responder suffering from post traumatic stress disorder. He takes you through real emergency calls; some are graphic and have scarred his heart forever and so has PTSD. He was a hero in the eyes of most, and yet PTSD tried to take that away from him.
He's haunted by what he has seen and by the dreams that follow. The dreams are wicked and prevent him from sleep. Daytime does not ward off the attacks; even small things like a door slam send him into hyper-vigilance. He will lose everything before he will find his way.
About the Author
James Meuer was a paramedic for twenty-six years. He has a bachelor’s degree in chemistry from UC Davis.
He is retired and living in Vacaville, California, where he can enjoy his three children. James can be contacted at damagedthebook@outlook.com.