Women Rush in Where Most Men Dare to Enter

If Jill and Tijuana were asked to write a page or two on why they desire a relationship, it sounds like it would be primarily for male attention. That’s fine. I believe we all need attention from the opposite sex. You may find yourselves dreaming up past romantic scenarios in your mind when you used to kiss and create passion with your old mates. Then you figure you’re strong enough to continue those things without going all the way with that person. That’s dangerous when babes in Christ are trying to be strong at a weakness. These two young ladies are babes in Christ. They feel like they’ve met every spiritual church requirement to validate their newfound salvation in the Lord. But is that really true? When we first come to Christ, it is quite natural that we’re still thinking and judging with our old mindset. And the devil would love to magnify such a mindset to confirm our potentially sinful ignorance, influencing us that our desires count for something, especially now that we’ve surrendered our lives to Christ. We feel like we should be compensated for such an agreement. Satan will influence us to think that we need some pleasures in our lives along with all the spiritual church routines. So now our conscience is cleared to find a mate to date, or which may turn out, finding a date to mate. Such ignorance would lead us to live double lives. We’ll find ourselves living like a church mother in the sanctuary, but living like the club scene elsewhere. It’s easy to be tempted in the mind that you can keep both worlds separate, thinking that God is more focused on your performance in the church world, leaving your personal world left entirely up to your own churchly discretion. How do I define “churchly discretion”? It’s when one believes that because they are in church now, they can handle themselves when they’re outside the church walls. Such a one has heard a good sermon on Sunday and now they feel like they can handle any temptation that comes their way. But what normally happens is when the temptation comes, we’ll reason with the temptation. We’ll strip that temptation of its sinful effects, turn it into an innocent incident, and sucked in are we. How does this relate to relationships? We may imagine a wonderful relationship with someone based on our mindset before receiving Christ. It may be a former mate, someone that we’re comfortable with or someone we’ve been eyeing for a while. We’ll desire that person because they look good, smell good, and got it going on in all the right spaces. What we fail to realize is that we become prey to the hunter. You would have to watch the Discovery channel to understand what it's like when a baby animal becomes a target for a hungry lion. That lion will sneak up on that baby animal because the lion knows that baby is not well skilled to watch out for hunting animals, nor strong enough to defend themselves. Such a babe makes it easier for a hunting lion. That’s why the mother normally keeps the babe right under her to protect it until the babe has grown up. Be careful---watch out for attacks from Satan, your great enemy. He prowls around like a hungry, roaring loin, looking for some victim to tear apart. (1 Peter 5:8 The Living Bible)) That’s how the devil is with babes in Christ. He knows that they dwell within their old mindset prior to Christ. So the devil wants to attack us before we learn his tactics, and become stronger and knowledgeable enough to resist him. That’s the main reason why most singles’ ministries encourage singles to stay in close with the Lord. As babes in Christ, we are in our most impressionable stages. We’ll be impressed upon our thoughts, the ways of the Lord, and the ways of the devil. God desires that we become more impressed with his ways, keeping our thoughts and ways secondary. So there is nothing wrong with having your own thoughts and desires because we were born with a mind to use. When God has specific commandments for us, He wants us to forsake our own way, deny ourselves, and follow Him. As we follow God, our mind will be renewed in Him and we will look at our own thoughts and desires differently, and agree that they are not better than God’s ways. But that’s only if we stay close to Him long enough without allowing our opposing affections to get the best of our focus. If we seek to rush into a relationship or a dating situation, then we are lead by our own ways, leaving God’s ways secondary (if that) in our lives. Remember when we accepted Him into our lives, we vowed that He could take control of our lives. But who’s really in control? So the Lord God said to the serpent, “This is your punishment: You are singled out from among all the domestic and wild animals of the whole earth—to be cursed. You shall grovel in the dust as long as you live, crawling along on your belly. From now on you and the woman will be enemies, as will your offspring and hers. You will strike his heel, but he will crush your head.” (Genesis 3:14-15 The Living Bible) Women you must understand that you have a personal enemy named Satan whose mission is to seek, strategize and carryout your downfall. Normally, he will attack your affections first. Why? Let’s define “affection” first. Affection- a mental or emotional state or tendency, disposition or feeling. Fond or tender feeling; warm liking. (Webster’s Dictionary) Understand why the bible tells us to allow God to control our affections because if He doesn’t, the devil will. “Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.” (Colossians 3:2) If you are now experiencing the same relationships as you have when you were in the world, then something is definitely wrong. Allow God to set your standards for you so you won’t fall for the same crap you fell for prior to salvation. If your standards are beneath God’s standards for your life, your affections will follow your low standards causing Satan to look your way. Most times, when the devil wants to set up a woman for a fall, he will send the wrong man into her life after she’s been enticed to date or fall into a relationship because of her need/desire for male companionship and attention. Anytime there’s an imbalance between our needs and desires our relationship with God will fall out of balance. Circumstances will prove where the heart stands. It’s impossible for a Christian woman to have overly strong affections for a mate and follow Christ according to His standards at the same time. Truthfully, the romance of a relationship will cater to our affections more so than God Himself. So if our affections are leading us, then God has a small chance right about now. Contrarily, one who submits to the leading of the Spirit will relate to God. It takes time to get to that point. Don’t feel bad if you’re not quite there yet. In actuality, we become victims of this scripture at some point in our walk. This people will draw close to me with their mouth, and honor me with their lips; but their heart is far from me. (Matthew 15:8)