Twelve Weeks of Dying

CHAPTER ONE

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John 14:1-4 “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also. And you know the way to where I am going.”

Bible verses ESV unless specified otherwise

The day that I remember was Sunday. I was nine years old and had stayed over at a friend’s house. We played with Barbie dolls most of the time. Leah was such a good friend. She was also an only child and had a lot more dolls than I had. I was the middle child of two brothers.
The phone had rung many times that Sunday morning and I did not think anything of it. But, I do remember sitting at the table with her family while eating butter pecan ice cream when the telephone rang again. There was something about that ring. I jumped in fright.
Leah’s dad asked, “Are you okay?” I answered, “Yes”, but felt something was not right. Then I looked at Leah’s mom. She knew my expression was demanding an answer and she said, “That was just your mom”. “She wants us to bring you to your grandmothers whenever you finish your ice cream.” I still knew something was wrong and was silent the rest of the time.
Leah’s dad kept asking me if I was okay. I kept saying “yes” but, something in my spirit was telling me that something was not okay. As soon as we arrived at my grandmothers, there were so many cars there and then my cousin, Johnny, came running to the car saying, “Grandma’s dead”.
My heart was broken. My brothers and I used to stay with her while our parents worked. She was a very important person in my life. I loved her so much. I remember her saying, “If you do not have anything good to say about someone, then don’t say nothing at all”. She didn’t say that to me, I just remember her telling someone that.
My grandmother cooked three meals a day. She was a wonderful cook. My grandfather would not eat leftovers so she cooked all of the time. Her grandchildren used to line up for her homemade jelly biscuits which were the absolute best in the world. My mom would always feed us before we went to her house so that we would not embarrass her by asking our grandmother for biscuits. It didn’t work. We still asked for her delicious jelly biscuits.
I did not witness the death of my grandmother. I was told that she made breakfast for my grandfather and then sat in her recliner and died of a massive stroke. She was a diabetic. Many times in the mornings I witnessed her giving herself injections.
Another thing I remember is the wake that we had for her. The funeral home brought her out to her home and many of us stayed up all night with her body in her casket in her living room. She had on a beautiful pink dress with long sleeves. My cousins told me to touch her and that would prevent nightmares after she was buried.
There were nine children in her family. A tenth daughter had died from drinking from a lye can that had rainwater in it. Back then, they made their own soap. That is what I was told. I have no memory of that.
My grandfather, as we knew him, died the day that my grandmother died. He never was the same again. Though, he physically died less than three months after my grandmother. After her funeral we all went out to his house. I remember him going into their bedroom and pulling two shawls from my grandmother’s dresser drawer. He wrapped a black shawl around me and a white shawl around my cousin. Forty three years later, I still have the shawl. I have worn it to many parties.
There were so many cousins in our family, so the girls were the flower girls. We carried the flowers into the church and all sat together during the funeral. I remember two of the songs that were sung; “Rock of Ages”, and “I will meet you in the morning”. I still miss my grandparents!
There is nothing like a grandparent’s love. It is unconditional.