Goodbye To Shame
Removing The Mask
by
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Introduction Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, Let this blest assurance control, That Christ has regarded my helpless estate, And hath shed His own blood for my soul.* What a wonderful verse to a good old hymn. Listening to my friend play this on the organ, I could feel a tear stream down my face. She played this old hymn with such passion. "My helpless estate" was certainly what I was feeling as I looked down at my three young children. I prayed to God that He would give me a strong but sweet attitude to get through this day. This day would prove to be a life changing day for all of us. For this day I would bury my husband of almost ten years. The sun was shining outside on this very crisp December afternoon. My kid’s faces were scrubbed so clean that their cheeks were shiny. I had put on my cute little light blue suit and ivory pumps. I had to face people whom blamed me for his death. Broken and sad myself, God gave me enough grace to move through this day and be a light to those who knew the truth about my marriage and the life God had freed me from. I was a young widow only twenty-nine years old. My children were left fatherless at ages twelve, eight and six. Though this is sad in itself, I must say there is so much more to this story. My children and I just had gotten out of a battered women shelter where we had taken refuge. My husband had been a very controlling and bi-polar man. Life seemed like a whirlwind. Then in one day it all changed forever. *It Is Well With My Soul, By Horatio G. Spafford, from Hymn Sources: Faith Publishing House, Echoes from Heaven, 1976 (168); Anonymous/Unknown, The Blue Book (199)
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About the Book
Tina Bears was overwhelmed with panic when her husband coldly told her, “I have gotten away with everything, everything but murder.” In this dramatic story of escape from a planned murder/suicide, Tina bravely recounts her life of hiding her shame under a mask of lies as a dutiful wife in a suburban Christian community. Tina learned to remove her mask, and shares her difficult journey through the shame of an unstable broken childhood home, the shame of a teen pregnancy, and the shame from a ten year abusive marriage.
Through her faith in Jesus Christ, God has removed Tina’s shame and allowed her to overcome a life filled with brokenness and abuse. She has gone from feeling like a worthless, second-class, shamed woman in the eyes of God, to an understanding of the fact that she is valued and loved by her Heavenly Father.
“Because of the love of God in Jesus Christ, my shame is gone, and now I can recognize that same shame in others who are hurting because of abuse. There is truly a great connection between the hurting and the healed. God has called me to reach out to those who are still hurting from abuse and to let them know that they are not alone in their pain.”
—Tina Bears
About the Author
Tina Bears lives without shame in beautiful Lee’s Summit, Missouri and is now the mother of five children. She worked for over nine years as a Personal Trainer, and holds an Advanced Certification as a Life Coach through the American Association of Christian Counselors, specializing in Health and Wellness. She is also an office coordinator at a local hospital, a public speaker, and is working on a second book.