Chasing Dreams

Dedicated, Not Ambitious What I am writing in this book is becoming apparent to me as I am writing it to you. This book is only me recording what the Lord has been teaching me into an adult Christian. Know that I am still considerably young, but I am doing the best I can. These lessons the Lord teaches me come from my day-to-day experiences in the past couple years. This chapter was actually inspired by an event pertaining to the publishing of this book. One morning I woke up to a phone call from a publishing company asking me about my vision for this book. They had gotten my number from my recent endeavors on the Internet searching for a publisher. The salesperson discussed my different options, and complimented me for writing a book so young. He also pressured me to go ahead and work out the publishing so that I would have my feet to the fire in getting this book published. Naturally, I hung up very excited, and I took it as a sign that I was close to becoming a published author. Subtly, I began to set a goal in my head to become a published author before I am twenty-one years old, which is a year away. It sounded possible, and I was excited by the thought of it. As the day progressed, that goal grew on me and grew on me. I couldn't stop thinking about the editing and polishing needed to have this book ready to be published before then. It made me feel driven inside to get the book finished. There was no longer the feeling of freedom in my writing; it felt like I had to get this book out as soon as possible. A new motive suddenly crept in and overcame my original pure dedication to record the truth God has given me. What I realized from this experience was that there is a huge difference between dedication and ambition. We are called as Christians to be dedicated to the Lord, to His will and truth. We are to give ourselves to an extra-personal cause. Something greater than ourselves is meant to drive us. I believe that the modern society encourages us to run on our own ambition, to let our interests drive us, when actually we were made to reach for something outside of our selves. When we are able to work out a pure dedication to the Lord, we will attain much more than what we could do by our own ambition alone. This dedication is meant to be the flame burning within us that will drive us into our destiny. So what is the difference between dedication and ambition? I always like to start contrasting terms using the dictionary. Ambition is defined as an earnest desire for some type of achievement or distinction, as power, honor, fame, or wealth, and the willingness to strive for its attainment. We notice by definition that ambition must have a clear goal to strive for. It requires that we have an object to be attained. It requires a particular type of motivation. For one to be ambitious, one has to have an incentive. With me, my ambition cultivates my desire for recognition. When I allow myself to be taken to ambition, I usually concern myself with goals that distinguish me as special or smarter than most my age. An earnest desire to stand out crops up within me. Of course this is natural I suppose, it is still detrimental to my walking with God. When I am concerned with setting goals based on ambition, I end up overstraining for things otherwise irrelevant to the big picture. My desire to become a published author before the age of twenty-one only produced negative results within me. It caused me to want to stop writing and start polishing/editing. This rather useless goal rendered me blind to the overall motivation behind this book. I originally started to record the truth the Lord gives me, so that others could be helped in their walk with the Lord. The ambition I experienced would have compromised the end result, all for an earthly achievement that would be otherwise useless other than bragging rights. Dedication comes from a much different heart. Contrasting these terms reminds me of the contrast we made earlier in this book between a wish and a dream. A dream is a passionate belief, whereas a wish is an inflamed desire. Likewise, ambition is only an inflammation of desire; dedication goes much deeper than that. Dedication is defined as complete and wholehearted devotion. The type of drive we are called to have is meant to be based off of our dedication to Christ. We believe in Him, we want to see His will done, therefore we act accordingly. When we experience this type of dedication, we are then able to accomplish what our true dreams are. If you cannot pursue a dream out of a dedication to Christ, then you will only be able to pursue it out of your own ambition. When we draw our strength from the Lord we can accomplish anything. ”I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). When you are not able to draw from this strength, you are limited to the strength of your own efforts. This is why it is so important to purify your heart, so that you may not be polluted by selfish ambitions. The kind of strength we are able to reach out for is infinite, it is truly everlasting. ''Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall, but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint'' (Isaiah 40:30-31). My dedication to truth is the driving force behind me writing this book. Personally, I have distaste for money, because I have seen it wreak havoc in my family, but the idea of being recognized was appealing to me. Sure enough, the stronger that ambition grew in me, the weaker my motivation for writing this book became. I began to feel overwhelmed, and doubts and fears about taking the next step of getting published rushed in. Now just because we are not to let our ambition drive us, we are not to think that we cannot strive for personal achievement. This, as most of life, must be taken in discretion. You must know that you will have ambitions, but those ambitions should not be the center of your motivation. Yes, I would like to have this book published before I'm twenty-one, but I will not allow that desire to become the center of my drive for completing this book. The center will remain on God's will, and if I can accomplish God's will for this book within that time frame, then my ambition will have been met. I will not strive for that to happen though, instead I will continue to dedicate my time to polishing and recording the truth God gives me. When the book is ready, it will be published. Who am I to publish God's work prematurely for the sake of my own ambitions? What you will notice in ambition is that you have a natural drive backing up your efforts to attain a specific goal. The desire for appreciation, recognition, wealth, or some other earthly goal will be your sole motivation. You will feel that you are striving for something by your own efforts to attain something for your own benefit. You are given a clear destination and often a deadline also. There will be specific requirements you must meet to fulfill that ambition. It will cause the process to be an inconvenient necessity to reach the progress. This ambition will literally keep you from enjoying your efforts, because all effort will feel like work. It will feel as if you are doing to get, striving to reach, and performing for a reward. Often this goes in a cycle, leading from doing to get, to getting to do, and back. You will strive to reach and reach to strive. Ambition is never fulfilled, it is always seeking more. You will constantly be thinking of the destination and the time of arrival. Anyone who has been on a long car ride knows that this makes the ride extremely slow and unenjoyable. It doesn't get you to your destination any quicker, unless you break the speed limit. And ambition is what causes many to do just that, to break the rules to attain the goal. They justify their efforts by their ambition, and end