Heart Connection

Relationships are absolutely necessary for any of us to survive, learn, work, love, be loved and procreate. These capacities are pre-programmed by the Creator into our computer-like brains and instilled in our hearts during the in-womb time period. And beyond this, new science tells us great and insightful information about the programming of our genes.
Your brain, each component of it from Brain Stem to the Cortex, has specific functions. Each human brain contains the necessary ability and design for connection with others. Come to find out, the human heart has a far greater capability than simply pumping life-giving, oxygen-containing blood through our bodies. It also is involved in optimal connection.

As life progresses beyond the womb, we begin to unconsciously (without conscious thinking or choosing) use the heritage we’ve received and the experiences of the womb as foundational templates, through which our future relationships are formed.

Within the “inner circle” of intimate family and friends, we bond to each other with a type of “emotional glue.” The extent to which a child’s needs are met will determine the type of “emotional glue” he or she will use to attach to significant others in life. Even though every child attaches to his/her caregivers, not all of the attachments are of a kind that will insure optimal heart-to-heart connection.

In childhood and onward through the years, some people seem to be “naturally” capable of intimate love relationships, and from their numerous intimate and caring relationships, these folk experience pleasure. Others do not. Some seem to feel no “pull” to form intimate relationships, and seem to find little or no pleasure in being close to or even in the company of others. They have few, if any, friends, their relationships with family are more distant and their emotional glue is of a different type.

This capacity and desire to form emotional relationships begins its formation early, while a child is still in the womb. The mother’s ability to connect emotionally with her unborn child greatly influences the formation of the child’s capacity to connect. Every mother’s capability is impacted by the way her parents bonded to her as an infant and by the relationship she has with the child’s birth father. The same is, of course, true of the father. Studies abound and experts agree that the parental relationship during gestation has a profound effect upon the unborn child the mother carries.

These early experiences, even before birth, and those in the first two years following birth, set the stage for our future marriage. What we absorbed during those early days, becomes a kind of filter through which passes all other relationships that we form and greatly influences how we feel, think and act in those relationships. We are even set up for the kind of person to whom we will be attracted! Perhaps he looks like your Dad or maybe she is as loving and gentle as your Mom. It could even be that the negative characteristic of a parent or sibling with whom you were raised, will become the model of the kind of person you will marry. Think about your own choices. Don’t believe it? Just wait and see!