The Classroom of My Life

As women, it is difficult to sometimes sit and enjoy a slight breeze blowing on a sunny day or catch up on some of our favorite shows. The difficulty comes in because we have so many tasks to accomplish and nothing on our ‘to do list’ can go undone. In times of stress, frustration, and anxiety it is difficult to identify the signs and symptoms. Sometimes those closest to us don’t realize the changes taking place. It’s not until we are forced to slow down, relax, and assess how we could have done things a lot differently, that we are able to see when the initial signs began to show. Hindsight brings so much clarity to many situations. As you read this book, it is important to realize that this may be a depiction of an extreme case of running on empty. You may not be experiencing the same things, but stop to think about whether or not you’re always on the go without taking time to recharge and reenergize along the way. Now, I take the time to enjoy the feeling of warm sunrays on my face, even if for a few moments. I know that if I don’t take the time to stop, I can very well return to a similar state of exhaustion and depression. It is my hope that you will love yourself from the inside out and take time out for the sake of you.

Let me not make you think mental illness is a light subject. No, mental illness is real. The mind is a significant tool that produces thousands of messages per second. This is why Romans 12:2 states, “And be not conformed to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect will of God”. Daily your mind is to be renewed with the goodness of the Lord and how he has given you the things you can’t give to yourself.

You’ve been able to wake up and have the breath in your body, the ability to walk around, sight, and etcetera. In that, you have been given a gift. In this gift, it is important to do as 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “ In everything give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you”. So, I may not have everything I want, but I have food, clothing, and shelter. I’m thankful for that. Even when you can’t think of anything to be thankful for, look around you and be thankful that you can actually see the things you don’t feel so good about seeing.

I wasn’t renewing my mind every day. I would maybe say a quick prayer and keep it moving each day, but I wasn’t putting on the total, refreshed mind of Christ. I was going to take on the world and sprinkle God in there in bits and pieces. Such a terrible mindset to be in, especially considering all the blessings I had and the ways that God made on my behalf that I couldn’t even see.

I had the mental capacity to retain the information being presented in books and lectures. Some people don’t have that ability, but I was taking mine for granted. I forgot to live out my life in humility. Wait, I thought I was humble, but not so much.

I wouldn’t necessarily take credit for the things I had accomplished; I mean I would thank God, my mom and dad, and my husband. That’s humility right? Not quite! Gliding over the thank you column was only the tip of the iceberg. It was more than saying thank you and not taking credit for things. True humility is about knowing that God has caused everything, since the day I was born, to work together for the good (Rom. 8:28).

I did not understand the disappointments and I certainly did not understand my experience with post partum as working out for my good, but it was. There is no wasted time in God. In the story of the two fish and five barley loaves, even the fragments were gathered up that none were lost (Matt. 14:20 KJV). The fragments, or the wrong turns and the trials we face, are still useful for a purpose. Whether that is to increase your faith or help you to learn what you should not do, it is not lost.