Here I Am: Tears of an African Immigrant

CHAPTER 1

I Always Knew God Was Real

A lot happened in 1998. At the time, I did not fully comprehend the dynamics of what my parents were sacrificing for our family to relocate to the United States. I was seven when the plans began to materialize. Zimbabwe’s economic condition in general and discord in my paternal family in particular had pledged allegiance to each other, and this was the reason for our migration. But more than anything else, paternal family conflicts seemed to be the leader of the coalition. All my life, I knew there were various tensions in the paternal clan, but it was still difficult to pinpoint what they were. They must have stemmed from jealousy, envy, and insecurities. Despite the source, I have always been thankful to God for my life and for my resilient parents.

I do not think I ever told my parents that even when I was just four, I always told myself in a light, soft voice that I felt God told me everything would be all right. I would close my eyes, knowing God was watching me in a comforting manner, and I would repeat, “Everything is going to be all right.”

As a child, I was exposed to many things children typically do not fully comprehend until adulthood if ever. I always knew God was real; nobody had to convince me of that. If anything, my parents instilled the fear of God in me, but it was as if I had already recognized the Holy Spirit’s comforting presence.

My parents have always been able to withstand and recover quickly from difficult situations. Most of the difficult seasons they experienced seemed always to stem from some members of our extended family. Family strife on my father’s side played a huge role in forming the woman I have become today. I am thankful for my parents. It would all make more sense later as an adult when I learned of the story of Joseph in the Bible; there are clear parallels. After experiencing such betrayal by your blood, what would all the midnight tears amount to? Struggles and pain experienced in a foreign country. Feelings of lost roots and no family support. Divine insights gained through the interpretation of dreams and visions. Battles against the Egyptians in our lives—the coalition as I referred to them. Despite Pharaoh’s pursuit, realizing all the trials were for our family’s sanctification—being set apart for such a time as this.

There I was, an African immigrant in tears. I often think of Genesis 50:20 (NIV): “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.”

I am thankful for my parents and for my resilient, prayer-warrior mother in particular. They taught me to pursue God and to work hard to achieve my aspirations.

Like Joseph, my parents had a lot of things going their way in life at first. They had successful careers. So many times, I observed their generosity to extended family for housing and education expenses. They were raising beautiful children in their happy home, which was designed and built from scratch—and was therefore a target of the enemy.

While my father and mother had great dreams that made them feel good about themselves, one day, our lives changed. Can you imagine how it must have felt to know a few paternal family members despised you so much that they would resort to unholy divination and schemes just to have their way?

We were forced to leave our comfortable life full of love from my maternal family and go forth into a foreign land. It was a fearsome and adrenaline-filled time, especially for me at a very young age. Yet God had His hand on every member of my family; He had a divine purpose for each of our lives. We did not understand why God had chosen this path for our lives at the time, but we never seemed to waver. God was always in control. We had no choice but to keep our eyes on God in prayer and hope that there was some purpose in the challenges we faced.

Is it not high time we break the silence? God hears us when we cry out and sees the tears on our cheeks. He will hear you if only you trust Him. Watch God guide you to your purpose. Your success is scheduled because God knew you even before you were conceived in your mother’s womb.

There have been all types of detours in my life and perhaps in yours as well. But I assure you that as long as you proclaim, “Here I am, Lord,” you are right on time.

It is the hour for all people, young and old, to be bold enough to share their testimonies. It is time to make it happen just as the last book of the Bible declares, “They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death” (Revelation 12:11 NIV). What an encouragement to us to avail ourselves of God wherever we are.

Let Him use you in hard times as well as in good times. It started for me with a solid foundation in God that was imparted to me through my family values.