Getting Around the Humans

When my daughter, Ellie, was four years old, we enrolled her in bumblebee soccer. It’s a game in which a swarm of kids chase a defenseless soccer ball around a field. Every so often, a little foot would make contact with the ball and the ball would go sailing in a random direction. The swarm would then swerve around to follow. Occasionally, the ball would actually tumble into a goal, and all the parents cheered. It didn’t matter if the kicker sent the ball through her team’s goal or the opponent’s. As long as it went through two poles it was a success.

One spring morning, I was sitting in the grass watching Ellie who was at the back of the swarm. She was following the little kids in front of her seemingly unaware of where the ball even was. I tried to call out helpful hints like, “Don’t follow the kids, get to the ball,” as well other sage advice. After calling out several more helpful hints she stopped chasing the swarm, turned around, and started walking directly towards me. I couldn’t figure out what she was doing since the swarm was moving the opposite direction. When she got to where I was sitting, she cupped my cheeks in her hands and put her face inches from mine. At this distance, even a dad could tell this little lady was upset. She said, “Dad, I am trying to get around the humans!” She then turned and rejoined the swarm.

After I stopped laughing I realized what had just happened. I wasn’t being helpful. I thought I knew what was going on. I shouted out advice based on what I was seeing, but wasn’t saying anything she could use. She was trying to get to the ball. She just didn’t know how to “get around the humans.” In my ignorance, I became one of the humans my little girl had to get around. Luckily, she handled the situation better than I did.

Like Ellie, we all have goals that we are trying to reach. It would be nice if we could just run up the empty field and drive the ball through the goal posts. However, that is seldom the reality. What we usually find are a whole mess of humans standing in our way. When you are in the middle of the fray, life may seem like that game of “bumble bee soccer.” But don’t worry; there is a pattern to the madness. There is always a reason behind the behavior of us “humans.” This book is geared to help you understand why we do what we do, and to navigate the “swarm!”